Don’t Let Anyone Steal Your Joy

“Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounded by assholes.”

This quote has been attributed to Sigmund Freud, William Gibson and a host of others. I found it both straight to the point and funny. Whoever can take credit for it!

We all learn to keep certain people at arm’s length, or we allow them into our experience. Taking care to protect our emotions.

Learn to not allow toxic people to steal your joy. If needed these folks may need to exit your life if you deal with issues concerning them. You don’t have to allow that, ever!

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Sometimes we have to move on from relationships to make room for the new. Changing seasons in our life will bring new friends, mentors and essential people that God sees fit to move into our life experience. Be open!

Embrace those that lift you up, challenge your status quo. Lots of people are searching for the same quality of life you are. I find great people at Church that follow a path of happiness.

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Find people that bring joy to your life. Don’t let anyone steal your happiness!

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Kick Horrors of Fear in the Gut, Strength, Courage is Yours NOW!

“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You can say to yourself, ‘I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.”–Eleanor Roosevelt

Facing fear comes in many forms. It also is indoctrinated into our psyche over years and years. We play into it when difficulties overtake our life. When the bombardment of “I can’t” “this is too hard” become so overwhelming in our minds.

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Just as the quote states we live through a horror.

The excellent news is the strength you need is within you. It’s not hard to tap into when you discipline yourself to overcome the challenge. Here are some daily rituals I do that help me get through:

  • Stop and just breathe. Take sixty seconds and breathe in through the nose and out through the mouth. Breathing will relieve tension in your body. This makes a measurable change in your body. 
  • Walk. Just get out and walk for a bit. Again relieving stress in your muscles will clear your mind. It’s incredible how this works. Walk up to a flight of stairs, walk down the street, just get out and walk.
  • Meditate. Learn to quiet your mind. Meditation can help you focus your mind on positive. There is a reason it’s called a meditation practice. Do this often, set designated times to practice your meditation. 
  • Grateful. Be grateful for what you have and for what is coming. Thank God for the blessing he is moving into your life. 
  • Pray. Don’t beg, pray. “Please God get me through this, please” NO! Give to God what you need, what he needs to guide you. Show him you’re grateful for it and let him do the rest. 

You can overcome adversity, fear, you name it you can overcome. It takes work, it takes some pain, it takes real desire. You can do it! I have to push every day to overcome huge fears. Someday’s the journey seems too much. That’s the time take one more step, do one more thing forward. This makes all the difference.

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Why Challenges are More Tempting than a Cinnabon

Yes, friends, I can hear you saying “have you ever had a Cinnabon?” Of course, I have who hasn’t but and this is a big but, challenges mean HUGE change is coming!

“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You can say to yourself, ‘I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.”–Eleanor Roosevelt
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Challenges have to drug me through change that feels like rolling down a briar patch hill at full speed. Bruises, cuts, stickers and a BIG owe damnit. If you’re like me, sometimes we fight change because of old habits and paradigms we need to shed like a snakeskin.

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A Challenge, Quit or Win it’s your Choice!

When you learn to embrace challenges life opens up in a whole new way. An easy analogy would be beginning a diet. At first, it’s a real challenge to put down a Soda, put down the ice cream bowl, put down a big juicy hamburger. It takes a reconditioning of our mindset to conquer this challenge. Willpower is tested to the nth degree.

Often we cave into temptation because of the pain of change at that moment is too high. Until we overcome that challenge to our will, we continue to struggle.

Here is how I overcome challenges that in the beginning maybe painful. Most change for a brief time is painful, just saying!

  • Resolve yourself to the fact that on the other side of this change, is that which you truly desire. Meditate on the end result daily, multiple times daily if needed.
  • Keep faith in your heart. Hope that you can do that which you desire.
  • Any discomfort is temporary. Change does not take the balance of your life to achieve. Really, you can’t take a month or two to make a notable lasting difference in your life? Come on!
  • No matter how dim it looks, how challenging it becomes never lose hope.
  • Make time every day to focus solely on the challenge and overcome fears that surround it.

Some will say easier said than done. Agreed!

If you don’t overcome fear, overcome pain, then nothing will change. You have to want it bad enough, the discomfort is temporary.

When challenge rears its head, you can be sure the enemy is behind this. The enemy does not want you to win. Don’t cave in! On the other side of this is the life God has for you. Nothing worth having comes without a price.

The price you pay when you successfully navigate to the other side of the challenge you will tell yourself “I would have endured a thousand times more to have what I have achieved today.”

Giving up is a bad habit for a temporary problem. Make a choice with me today, that giving up or giving in is no longer an option in your life! God bless.

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The Only Happy Resources You Will Ever Need

We all want to be happy! Duh!!!!!

The real monkey wrench is most folks are not. Happy is some now-and-again thing. Happy is a choice we get to make every waking moment of life. Happy, or sad it’s our decision.

A choice to be happy, yes I can hear so many screaming “I want to be happy you as@ but I can’t” because of this or that. YES, dear friends, you can make a choice to be happy in the middle of adversity! You only need some tools to draw from.

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With a bit of reconditioning ourselves, we can learn to smile in the midst of adversity. No, I am not saying you should say “Oh boy I just lost my relationship to a cheating so-and-so.” What I am suggesting is the response could be something more “thank God this person is out of my life to make room for someone who is right for me.”

How we internalize our pain will determine if we live depressed or we live with a free heart. Easier said than done you say? Not if you recondition yourself for happiness. How you say?

Let’s see, this is in no particular order:

  1. Meditate daily. Learn to meditate to quiet your mind. Your practice will help you find inner peace. Armed with inner peace life’s trials and tribulations will roll off your back.
  2. A spiritual connection with your God, higher power, or whom you call God.
  3. Faith, unwavering faith that no matter how hard you get kicked in the gut. Standing up facing adversity with a power you find when you stay in faith. Knowing in your heart that even if you’re at the brink of destruction, God’s hand will reach in and pull you out. “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.”– Hebrews 11:1
  4. Gratitude is the cornerstone of life. If you cannot find appreciation, you need a spiritual cleanse. We all can find recognition. If your children woke up this morning healthy, imagine the parents who’s children are fighting for their lives today. If you drove to work, imagine having to ride the bus today in the cold. See my point we all have something to be grateful for! Always!!!
  5. Prayer, make it a part of every day. First, don’t beg “please God just get me through this.” God knows what you need, go to him confess what you need to confess to him. Repent of your sins. Then thank him for the favor he shows in your life. “Thank you, God, for my healing favor” “Thank you God for my financial favor” ” Thank you God for my beautiful relationships.” Talk to God as you would a friend!
  6. Make time for you. This needs to be in the form of a walk outdoors. Get to a park, hiking trail, your neighborhood, just find a place that you can get outside. Why? Walking helps you relieve tension. Further, you can enjoy some fresh air, look around you and experience nature. Get outside yourself, if only for a moment!

These are six things that if you immerse your life into the practice of, you can find happiness. When you learn to relax, let go physically with Yoga, walking, let go emotionally via meditation, prayer, then you can draw happiness at will.

Let go of the past. If you’re hanging onto the past, let that shi^ go! The rear-view mirror gives you a focused view backward. What that means to you, a constant look at the garbage that you need to leave at the dump. There is a reason the front window is big and the rear window is small. What’s ahead of you is FAR more important than what’s behind you!

No matter what your state-of-mind is today. Start! Begin the process of training your noodle to embrace happy. All it takes is retraining our mind to embrace happily. Start right now by throwing your shoulders back, putting a smile on your face and say “today is my day!” Congratulations you took the first step, KEEP GOING!!!

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Secrets About Love the Government Is Hiding

“I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness because it shows me the stars.”–Og Mandino
This quote brings perspective to life, it’s all how you look at life, love, and happiness.

Have you failed in love, lost a relationship maybe even several. Has love eluded you as though it were some ultra-secret Government project? Romantic love, self-love, love of life, love, love, love!!!

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Love sets our world on its axis. Love can bring us to the brink of total self-destruction. Yet we seek it with a passion an unwavering passion. Imagine bringing to bear this same passion in all aspects of our lives. Think about when love has involved the level of intensity and commitment you bring to it?

Romantic love brings out the very best, but it can bring out the very worst in people. Love blinds our judgment at times. Yet we continue to move towards the train tracks when everyone is screaming the train is coming. Will walk right out on those train tracks in pursuit of love.

When it comes to love, romantic love is often times where love begins and ends. Yet love should permeate our life experience in all we do. Love should guide our personal journey. Keep in the back of your mind reading this article the power of love. Think about your level of commitment to the pursuit of romantic love.

What seems to hide from most of us. Loving ourselves, loving the life we’ve carved out for ourselves. The passion with which we chisel out our experience. The masterpiece we hope it to be.

Of course, we love our family and children. When I talk about love or just about anything that has to do with life. Take the family out of the equation (not in the wrong way). Everyone loves their children, spouses with all their heart.

The real question is, do you love yourself as much as you like someone else? The same love you show for your child, do you give yourself that same level of devotion? If you don’t have a child, it can be a parent, spouse or even a pet.

Do you love yourself with the same level that you like others?

The fact is being happy with yourself, bringing a glad you to this world. That’s where the real blessings begin. Where you find those hidden secrets to life that appear to be the most heavily guarded government secrets.

How do we find self-love you ask?

  1. Spirituality. Get connected to God, the Universe, a higher power. Learn where your soul lives!
  2. Meditation, get connected with your conscious and sub-conscious mind. Learn to quiet the mind so you can receive.
  3. Breathe! Yep, I said it, learn to take breaks during your day to breathe. The power of this sixty-second time for you is immeasurable. It relaxes your mind and lets go of tension.
  4. Yoga. If you’ve never tried Yoga, then let me invite you for a fantastic surprise. Go try a few classes, you will get hooked!
  5. Make an investment in yourself. Video’s, books, classes, anything that uplifts your own spirit.

These five things are a great start. Learning to love yourself can be a daunting challenge. We’ve all done things in our lives that we wished we hadn’t. Guilt and self-loathing can rear their ugly heads to help us kick our own ass. It doesn’t have to be that way. Speaking from my personal experience here.

Here is my take on the past. If you are not doing the same things, you did in the past. Living your life in a good positive direction. It’s time to let yourself out of history and into your new life. It’s okay to love yourself, even with a past. Hell, we all have a past, if you’ve changed let it go.

Past indiscretions are not life sentences. Not doing the same things that were done in the past is your salvation to a new life. Let it go to God, never do it again, and you can have peace. This is a big one for me. If people in your life can’t see the change, you’ve made or want to hang on to the past. Don’t let that steal your joy.

If you have friends or family still holding onto your past. Not much you can do about that.

Loving ourselves begins with a first step. My challenge to you is to make the first step right now. Don’t think about it, start. Take one action today.

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