A Guide To Real Change

A sneak look at my book A Guide To Real Change. Check out Chapter 1 of this fantastic book and begin the journey to change your life. We all need help changing aspects of our lives!

Chapter 1

 Together We Begin

Excuse me, hello, excuse me. Yes, you! Can you look this way, please? You’re looking at yesterday; I need you focused forward, thank you!

Are you looking forward to TODAY? When you woke up, did your feet hit the floor, with a smile on your face? Most likely not read on.

“Never let yesterday use up too much of today.”—Will Rogers

Today is all you have. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is just that tomorrow. So, what can you do to make today a good day? Plan for it. Have a program that has tasks that need doing today. Prepare the night before at least three things you know for sure you can accomplish in a day.

Have small successes every day. Complete tasks that will help bring about big success in whatever aspect of your life that needs help the most right now. Learn productivity vs. activity, read on you’ll see what I mean.

What happens is we tend to get to scattered out with all the things we need to fix. Like, relationships, jobs, ourselves, bills, and the list gets bigger. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time! Apply that to your life, and you will achieve much more.

This process of change has eluded me. By appearance, just organizing aspects of our life for success seem simple. The real test is, are you doing it now? Will you stay consistent?

Here are some tasks to help you get started:

  1. Set daily reminders on your phone to alert you to functions for that day.
  2. Use apps like Google Tasks, Google Calendar, they’re free. I use them, and they help me a lot.
  3. Make time in the evening to plan out tasks (minimum 3) for the next day.
  4. DON’T PROCRASTINATE!
  5. Use a calendar to help your track deadlines. Also, a Project Management app is a great way to keep track of your progress.

Five quick things you can do today!

It’s your turn to win! Get started right now. Don’t think, DO!!!

This book is the first step. Keep going.

Where to Begin

You are coming to a point in life where the outcome thus far is a disaster. If this is you, welcome, I welcome you to the beginning of your new life. Just reading this won’t bring change. If you want this, it’s going to take some work.

Before we begin, the importance of this one thing Patience! It cannot be understated.

“Patience is not simply the ability to wait – it’s how we behave while we’re waiting.”—Joyce Meyer

Without the patience to allow change to occur, you will stifle progress. My mother always told me this “it took you fifty years to break your life; give yourself time to change.” She was right as most moms are.

Where a failure occurs, most is the lack of patience to allow change to occur. We live in the “I want it right now society.” Get that out of your head right now. Where I stumbled hard — not allowing the universe to set a new course for my life. Think of yourself as a large ship that needs turning around. It takes a wide berth to achieve a safe turn.

Beginning the process will have its trials and tribulations. Your mind will fill with self-doubt, where patience becomes a struggle. Misery loves the company, and your noodle will remind you that “we love pain, we’re comfortable here” because you are comfortable in pain. You won’t let go quickly.

We all find ourselves in reflection to have a relationship with our pain. It takes years to develop, and it will take time to employ a paradigm shift.

Here is the skinny because I can sense those saying, “I don’t like pain.” We get so comfortable that our mind and body accept it as usual. Therefore, forbearance will see you through.

Don’t get discouraged when it seems that nothing is changing — allowing change to occur. Imposing your own will over a situation only makes an excellent job harder than it must be. You’ve heard I’m sure on God’s time, not my time.

Change cannot come without discomfort.

Don’t quit because of trouble. Evolution is not occurring as quickly as hoped. The pain of loss or other stressors is not dissipating.  The mind is continually in a barrage of negative thoughts, self-doubt, and feels as though nothing is getting better.

“I hated every minute of training, but I said, ‘Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.”–Muhammad Ali

Keeping an eye towards a positive outcome. Being grateful in advance of anything manifesting good in life. Meditate on the result.

If you take a trip around the world at some point in time, weather delays, airport delays, canceled flights, lost luggage, lost hotel reservations, something is going to happen. The chances are high that more than once.

Would you stop an ounce in a lifetime around the world trip over a delay? No, you deal with it and keep going!

What could you tell the younger you if you could? When you’ve drifted out into life like a space void only to look back into the abyss. You get a pit in your stomach that gives way to wow this sucks. Not exactly the experience you envisioned as a younger you.

Hitting the last half of life looking in a rear-view mirror that looks like an apocalyptic mess. Challenging our thoughts with “what a waste.” It begins to stifle any outlook because age has overtaken youth. The idea “I’m not the same as I once was.”

If you’re boldly marching into a mid-life crisis, menopause, or qualify for an AARP® membership. This story is for you. More importantly, if life has not turned out as you planned or hoped, does this give you a feeling of doom?

Everything we’ve read self-help wise in our lives has said to look forward never look back. Easier said than done but very accurate.

Over a year ago, I faced the questions I am posing to you now and staring divorce in the face, that at the time I did not want. With that situation at hand, my mind forced me to look back over my life. What I saw was not the beautiful painting I had hoped it would be — instead, everything past has illuminated for me to see very clearly — damned ugly!

The real kicker is a good bit; you don’t want to change, but the ugly is ugly. This also brings up a question that is the nasty uglier because of the situation currently adding to our loss or stress.

Not only is loss bringing pain, but so is life as we’ve lived it to date. As you often see in text messages, WTF!

Where do we go from here? How can you pick yourself up out of hell and gaze into the mirror and say I love you?

The strength needed to face you is perhaps the solidity you’ve searched for all your life. The power that comes from faith the best is yet to come and believe it. Facing you in the mirror. What do you see?

The choices of what you see can be boundless when in the depths of pain. The pain can become so unbearable that terrible darkness can overtake your thoughts. Damn, what a dark place. Are you sufficiently depressed?

Here is where we learn what advice we would have given our younger self. From this fountain of youth comes wisdom to carry us into our Senior years with a new brighter outlook. The struggle to realize life was not over. It merely takes recalibration of our thoughts.

This book is available on Amazon. Click the cover to check out this amazing book.

book, ebook

Self-Doubt, Fear, on the other side, IS your Blessed Life

Self-doubt can overtake our life to the point of self-destruction. Stifle any positive progress. When you have a breakthrough along comes self-doubt. The enemy will love to see you implode.

“An exciting and inspiring future awaits you beyond the noise in your mind, beyond the guilt, doubt, fear, shame, insecurity, and heaviness of the past you carry around.”–Debbie Ford

Do you know why doubt comes into our mind? The attack of self-doubt comes from the enemy who recognizes that God is about to change your life. Your blessings are just around the bend, and the enemy says “oh no you don’t, let’s get that head filled with doubt and fear.” So, you get overwhelmed and stop.

prayer, spiritual, self improvement

When you need to shift gears, dig in and realize your amazing destiny is about to unfold. The enemy will choose to entrench himself to prevent any blessings. Fight, fight as you’ve never fought before. Don’t let him win. Let God know it’s your time; you’re not losing this time!

Let the enemy know he has no power over your life and cast him out of your mind, declare your life in Jesus name.

Don’t let doubt or fear debilitate your life. This attack is telling you that blessings are about to unfold, stay in faith! Your time to win!

Too often we take doubt, fear, despair, as though you must stop. We get depressed saying nothing will go my way. Sadly, many will give up. God never says if you get through this time for thirty days you will have blessings on day 31 and you give up on day 30. No precedent in the bible for giving up.

The amount of time we spend in despair is our choice. If you can learn to overcome, stay in faith, your destiny will open before you.

Keep your attitude knowing no matter what door slams in your face you’re going to immediately be happy because a new door is out there for you.

Cleaning up some wreckage of the past I was on the phone the other day with the IRS. Scary thought, right? The first person I was able to work with took over an hour to get on the phone — very nice lady walking me through fixing a problem. Almost done with everything and we lose our phone call. She is disconnected in a blink of an eye. All that work I was screaming “no, no, no, ah man.” Being honest you might have heard an expletive or two.

After waiting a while with no return phone call, I call back. On hold for well over an hour. Get through a few more people to get to the nice lady that helped me finish.

More to the story this is where God touched this situation with favor. After the final lady and I started, she read through my file. Comes back on the phone twenty minutes later to explain to me that what I was doing with the first person was wrong. The solution is simple. She made some adjustments to my account and like that it’s over. Everything is now okay!

God had to get me off the first call to get me to the right person. The person who would fix all and make everything okay again. God closed the phone call that by my first reaction was “no oh my no, all that work lost.” When in fact it was not the solution at all. That day I gave myself a B+ on how I handled the situation. I kept saying all the while “God has me.”

When God moves situations around in your life, sometimes it won’t make sense. Just remember that life is adjusting to help you not hurt you. Think about this for a while. Help not hurt!!!

A cure to your problem can occasionally come in the form of what you think is a problem. Don’t be fooled; keep your eye on the ball. God has you!

Comments or Questions:

 

 

Stand Up Under Attack

Last night I had an amazing revelation while watching a video by TD Jakes. How to fight and win spiritual battles. Stand Up and Fight!

For weeks the attacks, and trials the enemy has put before me I didn’t understand. The message I heard was life-changing for me. “Sometimes the enemy knows us better than we know ourselves.” His attack comes because he knows what is coming for us. He sees before we see the blessing that we’re about to receive. So his attack is planned so we don’t see it coming.

An attack that by design will destroy you IF YOU ALLOW IT TO. You have the strength to release it to God through faith. If you go toe-to-toe with the enemy, you will lose! If you think you can figure it out in your head, you will lose. I tried, and for my effort, I have been on the brink of breaking several times. The pain I have put myself through is debilitating.

You can fight not to allow your thoughts to wonder; you can fight for strength to move forward. What you can’t do is fight the enemy on his ground. That is God’s domain. We all can rebuke, bind and cast the enemy back to hell. Let the main event be Gods fight. If we can do this together, we will win.img_1540

He is attacking you hard because of the enemy fears who you will become in Christ. He won’t go without a fight. The good news it’s not your fight, you don’t have to step into the ring ever. Faith will be your weapon. I can hear so many of you screaming “I can’t take this anymore, faith, God put me here” no friends he did not. I thought that too.

The enemy would love for us to believe that. Then his stronghold on our faith is clamped hard. Don’t do this to yourself. Your weapon to fight is so easy it’s faith. Remember the harder you have to fight to hold onto your faith the greater your blessing on the other side of this trial. It is what it is you have to believe. Stop trying to understand it; the enemy will confuse you to the point of doubt.

Attacks will come from your mind, depression, people around you, beating you down. Don’t fear this. Embrace it that God does not make mistakes, nor does he put these things in your path. If you through your undying faith stand up and praise God and tell the enemy, God is in my soul, and we cast you back to hell you are not welcome here. Know in your heart that God is with you. That through this gut-wrenching trial the person who survives it will be might in this land. YOU ARE A CHILD OF GOD, fear nothing! Cast out all doubt and fear.

 Be sure the enemy will come back. The next time he does your faith is rock solid. The attacks come because the enemy fears who you’re becoming. We’re stronger than he is through Christ.

My messages are always a pathway of hope. I am not a theologian or a therapist, but a man just like you that want’s something more from his life. Sick and tired of being sick and tired! Through the trials, I face the attacks on me if I can find ways to combat, get through to a new life. I want to share that information with anyone who will listen. In hopes that you don’t reach the same dark depths I have. Sometimes this message is a hope that it saves your life.

What I am sharing saved mine! I am grateful that the internet filled with good people’s messages of hope. It’s not hard to find, it’s not hard to follow if you open your heart.

Welcome your comments or questions: