Need to Stop Arguing this may Help

How to start a civil conversation when you and your spouse, significant other, are fighting to the point you can’t say a nice word. This takes both you coming to the table as a cease-fire.

This is a fantastic way to have a civil conversation. What our goal will be is to talk without fighting. If you can begin a civil discourse, then you can start to find healing words and a way back to happiness.

self help, love, happiness

For this, to work, you have to both agree to NOT talk about your fight. This is a total cease-fire of all ugliness! Each must come with an open heart. 

  1. Make a time where you can sit down totally uninterrupted. No alcohol, no wine, just coffee or a soda. The two of you ONLY. Kids need to-go-to grandmas.
  2. Each of you agrees with no curse words.
  3. Rock, paper, scissors to see who talks first. Best two out of three if needed.

So what is the conversation going to be?

Give this some thought before you sit down. Assuming you are agreed.

Pick something about your life that your partner does not really know about you. The story can be about anything except for a topic that Segways into your argument. 

The whole point of this is to talk about something that allows the two of you to communicate! Each takes a turn in telling a story, having a conversation that is merely the two of you talking.

If you’ve completed this, we have one more exercise.

What made you fall in love with each other? Have a conversation about what makes you happy together.

If you can do these two things then perhaps what you’re arguing about is not that big a deal. Sometimes, we just need to talk civilly and then remember why we love one another.

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Life Changes can be a Twirl & Hurl Ride

Successful people will tell you that one thing that sets them apart is they’re willing to take one more step than you. Meaning you must be ready to move through the marathon wall and not give up. Giving up is a habit that we can break!

The other difference is people confuse activity with productivity. Don’t just merely be busy be productive in every area of your life.

Life can be a twirl & hurl ride. Up and down repeatedly. Are you ready to put down the puke bag and live a life without tummy medicine? Of course, you are and so am I. Together we can walk a new path, set a new trajectory for our lives.

Carnival, Life, Hope

Faith that you will succeed in all aspects of your life takes commitment. What you’re reading is an all-encompassing view of success. The relationship, Spiritual, Career, Family, and most importantly for you. Not a conceded look but you have the right to be successful for yourself.

Without an inner peace that life is a joy, it really won’t matter the rest. Finding a personal success in our lives is something to strive for. With it, you’re unstoppable!

Finding our way for some is an emotional roller coaster that gives a whole new meaning to “twirl and hurls.” Keeping our faith in all aspects of our lives that all is well, trusting in the positive and not the negative. Struggling through can be overwhelming. Don’t walk alone anymore. God is here you no longer have to be alone.

One thing that really stands out to me is without success in all aspects of our lives; then something is always missing. Success is not money if you believe that welcome to chasing your tail. Life balance in all areas is a real success. It’s not the measure of your wallet!

Seeing so many successful programs available that are only about business success. Nothing is really touching on the fact that if you don’t have success in your personal relationships, spiritual growth, personal growth, then any progress you might have outside of these areas will be fleeting at best.

 “Success is a state of mind. If you want success, start thinking of yourself as a success.”—Joyce Brothers

What steps are needed to take to achieve success?

  1. Patience is most certainly required to achieve success in any part of life. Some things will come quickly and some slow. Getting frustrated will only delay progress. Remember imposing you will interrupt what God’s plan is for you.
  2. Do the work necessary to move life forward as best you can. Some days that may be small steps other giant steps. Moving forward, big or small is all good.
  3. Never let setbacks end the process. See them for what they are delays only. A dear friend in the Church explained it to me this way. Perhaps the delay is driven by God working out other situations so that your progress can continue. That if you had just hung in a bit more, the train would start moving again.
  4. Make time for growth. Don’t overwhelm yourself trying to do everything at one time. I find myself guilty of this. Trying to shove too much into a short period. Mark off time in your calendar to focus on one thing. Whether it’s for a few minutes or a couple of hours, be present at that moment!
  5. Open your heart to new ideas that perhaps not being familiar with have shunned away. Learning new ideas, techniques, and knowledge can move your life along in ways never dreamt of.

Have a master plan!

“Being busy does not always mean real work. The object of all work is production or accomplishment, and to either of these ends, there must be forethought, system, planning, intelligence, and honest purpose, as well as perspiration. Seeming to do is not doing.” — Thomas A. Edison

Sit down and identify how you intend to get from point A to point B. If you don’t have a clear plan spinning your wheels will be commonplace. Put on paper what you want to achieve, how you intend to get there and begin. You can revise your plan as your life evolves.

Once the process has begun updating progress and changes daily will help move along the process.

One thing that really helps me. Set reminders in your phone to remind you to stay on course.

Example:

  • Meditate with an open heart and mind.
  • Use affirmations to remind you that things are going to be okay.
  • Remind yourself everyday changes you desire to make in your life.

If you have never been to where you’re going in your life. Then a roadmap is a good idea. Goals, a plan, and progress reports will all help you get there. If you don’t plot a course, you will merely sail around in circles. The primary key to unlocking the power of your goals is visioned it like its already to you. You have already that which you desire to achieve.

Being grateful that you already have achieved the goal even though it has not manifested yet. It’s all just a matter of time. Believe with all that is you, that you have what you desire.

Doing this in every aspect of life. Health, Spiritual, Relationship, Business, or whatever you deem a worthy venture for yourself. Have a plan! If you have others in this process, bring them on board as part of your process. Mentors that uplift and challenge your status quo!

Absolute Commitment!

When it’s time to change people often bail when the going gets tough. The mind tricks us into believing it’s too hard or painful. The enemy is going to crack down hard to keep you in misery. Don’t be fooled into stopping progress. Don’t be tricked into mediocrity.

This takes practice, and that’s okay. Learning to want something with all your heart is easier said than done. Doubt, fear, and old paradigms can stifle progress. Leaning to have unwavering faith in the absence of results is something learned.

Prayer, meditation, visioning, affirmations, all must become a part of daily life experience. It’s not hard; it just takes commitment.

Anytime we change our lives for the better; often all hell breaks loose in our head. Doubt, fear, and worry. It’s easy to quit or freak out to the point we fail. Even when you come to the brink of disaster if you can stay in faith, believe even when you see nothing to think for.

Take a step right now. Don’t delay, get started this very moment. Take one action forward. This is how the journey begins, one phase at a time! You got this!

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Drifting away Spiritually

Over the last few weeks, I have noticed a bit of complacency in my own life. While I think it’s okay to feel okay. My life does feel a bit out of step. How to keep grounded in your spiritual journey and not drift. A good title for this article, The Anchor, is Up and we’re Drifting.

The good news for me is that I recognize that I am drifting. It’s a common problem to have everything going okay, and we let our guard down only to find ourselves straying off the path. Hence here I sit!

Being okay is indeed okay. We need to relax our minds to reduce stress, take a moment to simply be at peace. The problem lies in getting too complacent. Forgetting that our spiritual journey cannot only occur in times of our own need. When things are blowing up we can’t then go to God and say save me. It’s not that he won’t it’s that we allowed ourselves to stray from our connection to God.

God, Church, spiritual

So today is my day to get back on the spiritual horse and ride again. Tonight I am going to Church because someone I think a great deal at Church asked me too. Even though it’s the end of the month for me at work, we’re behind and I could use this as an excuse to not attend. I work in the Church bookstore before and after service. They need me to volunteer tonight which is not a regular night for me.

If I pause and look at the invitation to help is God working subtlety to help me recognize where I’m at spiritually. Sometimes, you have to look beyond just a simple request and see if you might be missing the real reason. Me needing to attend Church, be of service to others in the bookstore. These are very important to me and need my fullest attention.

My point to all this is don’t get complacent with God. We all tend to find peace in our lives. This is when we need to continue to worship God, don’t put off prayers, church or being spiritually connected to the source in some way. The lord has nudged me a bit to remind me that he loves me enough to say Bob come back to me, don’t drift so far out.

My heart feels much better knowing that I actually recognize what we’ve discussed in this brief article. Things are okay in my life and God is working miracles in my life all the time. It’s time to say to him I love you, thank you and I am always here to worship you!

If you feel that you’ve drifted a bit. Get back to Church, do something nice for anyone today. Give to a local charity, food bank or dog rescue. Do something to be a blessing to someone today. It can be a small thing just put yourself out there.

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Patience is a Virtue, argg!

At heart I think we’re all a bit spoiled to want instant gratification, we want it now! For me, this is a struggle. When we think about the plan for our life waiting for things to unfold as they should is a struggle for most of us, to accept.

Frustration could not be more pronounced in my life today. I want everything to change right now. Imposing my will only slow down what God can do for me. Do you find yourself battling your head? I do! Just about every day, it seems to hit me the frustration of waiting.

Finding a way to quiet the old noodle is a problem that I want to change NOW. Something I can do right now that is not imposing upon the universe is evolving negative parts of my life to positive outcomes. So I move this situation to prayer. Will, it honestly works faster maybe or maybe not?

patience, Jesus, Faith

What Patience Looks Like

That is the real challenge of faith. Just being able to relax and say okay God I’m with you, so let’s see where you’re taking me today. Bang! I don’t want to wait. I end up having to remember all the beautiful things that have happened to me in God’s good time.

Okay, so ego says you can do this, jump in, we got this. God will unveil to us our destiny if we choose to let him. Keeping busy helps me relax my head enough to slow down and relax, here are a few things I do:

  • Take a walk; I call it my prayer walk. Talking to God, sharing everything that I can.
  • Write as I am now. Do you have something like this you can do?
  • Do you have a home project that needs doing?
  • Work out, play with kids, do something busy.

If you keep your head busy, then the enemy can’t sneak in and muddle your brain. It’s also hard to find whether your thoughts are with God or being directed by you. Always ask in prayer for guidance. Happened to me the other day I started down the path and realized that I was going the wrong way.

Subsequently, I was able to let God know that my choice was not a good one, and moved back onto the right path. It was pretty cool to see that I can make a mistake. That God’s not going to punish me for mistakes that I might make. It’s like I’m a bowling ball that God is the bumpers that keep me going down the lane.

We all need the patience to allow the beauty of our lives to reveal itself in good time. When we force the issue that can delay our journey with unnecessary frustrations. I get it! It’s tough for most of us. I’m certainly not suggesting you sit on your backside and do nothing but don’t force an issue. When you meditate on this, you will gain clarity.

Slow down, pray about it and do what you should every day to keep life moving. When you think about a thing enough, you in your heart know what the right thing is and what is the wrong something. Do the right thing!

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To Big for Your Britches

Remembering to stay connected to God when things do go your way. To keep your blessings moving forward, you can’t stop going to God and expect everything to remain in place. A mistake I made that slowed my progress, so I have had to hit my knees and let God know I have not forgotten myself.

My grandmother called this “being too big for your britches.”

When blessings come, old habits can creep back into our lives. Understanding this will make your walk, your path much smoother. For me, I even was called out by a friend that my language offended a dear person to me. A person whom I would never intentionally want to hurt with a potty mouth. Old habits die hard.

faith, Jesus, God

Stay Humble

Learning from this was tough medicine to swallow. So begins my repentance to God. You should as well if you’ve strayed from the path. Stay on the road with God. A full-time, not pick and choose time process. Today I feel more back in tune with the Lord. My heart is more at peace.

I want the promises that the Bible says are mine. When I began this journey, it was about not losing anymore. That there had to be a better way to live than the trajectory my life was advancing. Terrible place, lost relationships, financial problems, and despair. All of a sudden God blesses me in significant ways, and I take my eye off the ball and get hit right in the head with a fastball.

With a sincere heart and prayer. Will pass and learn what not to do embedded deep in my heart. If you’ve suffered from this because you to went off the beaten path, God will happily accept you back in his good grace. Do what I’ve done, get on your knees, and get back in God’s good grace. Never allow yourself not to be humble.

 

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