Choice, Decide Already!

Choice

If I asked you to make a choice right now to be happy, but you’re suffering through a terrible divorce. Could you be satisfied just by making that choice? The short answer is yes! Before you hit the refund, button hears me out.

What stops you from choosing to be happy in a moment is you. I should say years of conditioning yourself that you can’t just simply change. Why can’t you? Should be the real question.

Let’s take our divorce scenario to a little higher level. If divorce is imminent even though you don’t want a divorce.

Two options:

Option A:

  • Stay bitter, sad, emotionally done, not having any thought as to a new future.

Option B:

  • “Choose” to be happy. Yes, the person whom your life revolved around is gone. The Universe, in its infinite wisdom, is taking you down a new path. Presuppose for a moment that this new life if given a chance, has more love, joy, happiness, and fulfillment than you ever thought possible.

If you choose to be happy, “Option B” certainly has more promise. The simple act of choosing one from another is incredibly powerful.

Over a year ago someone that I am proud to call a friend explained away my own pain from divorce like this: “If you could have your wife back today and go right back to the way things were, OR, you could have the relationship you never thought possible. Which would you choose?”

That’s when I knew that I had to make a choice for myself. If something in your life is meant to be, then it shall.

The real rub is that for years-and-years, we conditioned our minds towards limiting beliefs. We end up saying:

  • If I just change, she will come back.
  • If I learn to keep my mouth shut.
  • If I lose twenty pounds.

The problem is NOT you, it’s the paradigm that is so entrenched in your head you can’t shake it off. Using the divorce analogy just scrapes the surface of this problem. This book is not a “how to get over divorce” book. NO, far from it.

How to change limiting beliefs, the unknowing lies we tell ourselves every day. What our journey well reveals to us, we can make a choice and move on, NOW!

Prayer, self improvement, society
Choice do you really want me to pick?

Yes, friends easier said than done. However, very doable. With some guided practice, you can learn to decide, stick with it, no regrets, and blaze a trail for others to follow. Pardon the cliché!

How do you we make these changes you ask? Training our minds to a new healthy reality. Who says you can’t do something; you need only look in the mirror? That’s who!

Part 1:

How many years have you heard phrases like?

  • You/I don’t have that kind of luck.
  • No education, you can’t do that.
  • You’re too fat.
  • You’re too skinny.
  • You’re not part of that social group.
  • Oh, honey, why don’t you lower your sights to something more realistic.

From as many years ago as you’re able to remember we’ve all heard the limiting phrases getting stuffed into our mind.

What is being communicated to you is, “If I can’t do you surely cannot.” By well-meaning parents, family, friends, and other well-wishers. So, if these lovely people are telling me this, it must be true. NO, not only NO; HELL NO!

The only person on this planet that knows whether YOU can do anything is YOU! It does not matter what your Mom, Dad, Grandmother, Friend, Boss, has to say about what you can do. The ONLY person that knows is your period!

People close to you will naturally want you to play it safe. None of us want to see a friend hurt. Who the heck says you must hurt? I’m not shouting at the top of my lungs “oh God, don’t write the first Novel you failed English literature.”

Again, I go back to the systematic brainwashing society shoves down our brain. How many folks have completed Marathons in wheelchairs or with lost limbs? Hundreds if not thousands. Why Choice! The choice NOT to allow something horrific to bring them down.

Mediocrity is a disease of the mind. It’s a cure; “Choice!”

Part 2:

How to break free, so Choice comes at will.

  1. Meditation / Prayer: see yourself through this practice as free of limitation. That my life, my choice to see it through as a vessel of the Universe. Not some, “I don’t have this or that mentality.”
  2. Put the affirmation “Choice” Refrigerator, bathroom mirror, reminders on your phone daily.
  3. Learn to believe in yourself. Take the training wheels off your life. When you feel you can’t do something learn to ask yourself; who said! With enough training and knowledge, you can bloody well do anything you want!
  4. Practice, Practice, Practice! Do not give up or in at the first sign of difficulty. This is something you must want as much as air. We’ve all heard the businessman who asked a guru “how do I become successful,” the Guru replied, “meet me at the beach at 6:00 AM and don’t be late.” The next morning the businessman is on time, and the Guru takes him out into the water up to there chest. The Guru grabs the man and holds his head down in the water until the man was in great distress. Lifting the man out of the water, the businessman screams, “Why did you do that?” The Guru calmly replies, “When you want success as-bad-as, you wanted to breathe, then you will find success!”
  5. Gain knowledge. The reason people quit is insufficient knowledge. If people aren’t saying to you, “Wow, I have no idea you could do that.” If the wow factor is not WOW, then gain more knowledge. Become a voracious reader.

Nothing on God’s good earth prevents you from achieving anything. If you set your mind to something, trust that God will give you the knowledge, and move the Universe into alignment for you. Believe that as much as you want to breathe (like our Guru analogy).

All it takes is a choice. Your choice to stay status quo or your choice to live a life most would only dream about.

“Infuse your life with action. Don’t wait for it to happen. Make it happen. Make your own future. Make your own hope. Make your own love. And whatever your beliefs, honor your creator, not by passively waiting for grace to come down from upon high, but by doing what you can to make grace happen… yourself, right now, right down here on Earth.”–Bradley Whitford

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Faith or Give Up

What happens when you stay in faith even amid ruin? I can actually answer that!

Last month was shaping up to be brutal income wise. Negativity, in my own mind, was snowballing to the point I was in a very dark place. My day job is sales, and we no longer get commission vouchers to know where we are during the month with no real way to track. Not the fairest method to manage sales people “not my monkey not my circus.”

Handed deal after deal saying credit was not sufficient to purchase. Yet no notes that the company even tried beyond sending it in. Finance you have to walk on more difficult credit customers. Since this was my job for the last 25 plus years of my career. Particularly hard for me when I know some could be deals.

hope, prayer, freedom

Letting all this get to me it clouded my brain. Frustration took over.

Somehow through all of this, I mustered up the courage to continue to let God know that I was still here. Over-and-over I would say, “God has me.” Staring a mountain of debt in the face each month is tedious.

During the month, I would take time to just let God know I don’t see a way, so please make a way. I freely admit most of the time, I was really stressing out. Somehow though I was able to show God that it might only be a mustard seed of faith, I have hope.

Finally arrived pay-day. Contemplated how I would survive the month, what was I going to lose, on-and-on. Had asked God many times to please show me he is with me, that I don’t want to be in this dark hole.

My friend, who works in accounting stopped in my office to hand me my paycheck. As I sat in my chair, bracing myself for the worst. Opening the envelope to immediately look at the dollar amount. I had to stare at it for a moment to realize it was so much more than I imagined it would be. “Oh, my” and I began to cry.

Not only could I meet the obligations, but I also have enough left to pay extra. Not any other time in my life did I feel so humbled.

Keep in mind we are not privy to our income. Sales commissions can range from $100 to thousands, but we have no real way to know. So opening your paycheck is literally like seeing a lottery ticket. It may win big or may not win at all.

The point to all of this is, stay in faith. Even when you cannot see a way, a way is being made if you let God know, do the work you need to every day. I admit honestly if giving myself a grade, it would be a D-, yet as the bible says:

Matthew 17:20 King James Version (KJV)

20 And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; it shall remove; nothing shall be impossible unto you.

We all struggle through tough moments, and it is very hard not to lose faith and hope. For many years in my life, something like this last month, I would have thrown in the towel long before God could provide a miracle.

You just have to talk to God.

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What Happens if I Get Up at 4AM?

Now we must retrain ourselves. Mind, Body & Soul.

“I hated every minute of training, but I said, ‘Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion,”—Muhammed Ali

Years and years of garbage, we’ve fed our brains, and for many of us our bodies. Let’s clean up both. We can all do better in mind, body, and spirit.

Schedule time for mind, body, and soul. Let’s learn how:

  1. Let’s start with our body. Without stamina, you will peter out before you finish a full day. 4:00 AM lets begin with cardio. Give yourself one hour to take care of your body. Walk, ride a bike, treadmill, jumping jacks, just do it.
  2. 5:00 AM lets feed our body. Nourish the body temple with foods that truly feed your body. While we’re eating, listen to motivation, listen to something that fills your mind with knowledge. Find a Podcast, listen to a video, read while in the kitchen. Fill the mind and body with energy food.
  3. 6:00 AM, it’s time to feed the soul. Meditate, visualize, get on your knees and find God. Find your spiritual self. You have not because you ask not. Up your ask and God will up his give.

Now imagine where you will be Mind, Body, and soul after one year 365 hours focused on each of the three purposes to create the world-class you.

prayer, hope, love

You can lay in bed, believing the bullshit story you’ve sold yourself most of your life. This is too hard; I can’t do it. Keep that opinion and your right. This is your wake-up call. Set the damn clock and take your life back, the enemy will convince you that you’re nothing, I’ve tried everything, If you bloody tried everything you would be living the life you want, not the bullshit life you accept.

Learn with me to manage your mind. Getting up at 4:00 AM, really you can’t get up that early, who the hell put that in your head, YOU. Get up.

The rest of the day focus your time with actionable tasks that produce a result. If working on anything that does not create a measurable outcome is a waste of time. Social media being your number one waste of time. Unless engagement with customers, fans, are the subject of your social media time. You’re wasting valuable time.

Let’s take a social media look. If your accounts are ways you engage customers or fans, then set daily times for this activity.

When you get to work, have a day filled with times that you perform set tasks. Doing the best, you can to stay on task during the day. If you get distracted, come back to where you left off.

What I use to track my day (this is no endorsement, it’s just what I choose to use). Two apps I have on my phone is Google® Tasks and Google® Calendar. The reason I use them is they’re free, and they work in unison. They also alert me when it’s time to change and move on. It also allows me to set up recurring activities to plan. Saves time.

Whatever calendar and task manager you choose to use. Use it. Even schedule downtime, take breaks to recharge.

If you track your day, focus time for activities and you don’t allow distractions for that time. If you don’t find twenty hours in your week that you gain. Something is wrong. When we honestly track our time, hold ourselves strictly accountable for time. You will find you have time in your day to do more!

Get your ass up or stay where you are. It’s your choice. Only you can begin this.

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Plan B Hell NO!

There is NO plan B! If you want to succeed throw plan b the hell out the window. Plan B puts doubt in your head. Meaning you have an out if what I am doing now fails.

Burn The Ship was born from an idea that originated in 1519. That year, Hernán Cortés set sail to Veracruz, Mexico with his crew. … As legend has it, Cortez had the men burn their ships, leaving no option but to press on! Their ability to retreat to their previous way of life was gone; their safety net had been removed.

Exit strategy no, have your plan that includes income to take care of your family. If you have a family when you jump, make sure you have income sufficient to support your family. When I say no plan b, I also mean don’t be stupid. Have your plan so well thought out, you have all your contingencies covered.

God, Spiritual, Prayer

Failing shows the path NOT to travel. You back up and go a new way. Fail, back up to a new direction until you find the way! Learn to be comfortable in your pain. Pain shows us where not to be, but points us in a new direction if you find comfort in your pain. You don’t break! You improvise.

“When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, ‘I used everything you gave me.”–Erma Bombeck

Burn the damn boats. Either believe or don’t. It’s that simple. If you don’t wholly believe in your dream, rethink your vision.

Work your ass off. Want to fail? Buy into the BS you can succeed in thirty days. Plenty of bullshit programs on late night TV to sell you garbage dreams. You need to get a vision that allows for failure with NO plan b. Burn the boats. Improvise, adapt and overcome.

Learn that what you put in is what you get out. Be honest with yourself that if you’re not getting what you want, YOU can change that outcome. There is no plan b, there is today, don’t worry for tomorrow kick ass today so you can have a tomorrow.

We can stay the person we are today, or we can burn the damn boats and make a life.  

“A life that in the end God even says wow dude if I were going to live a life I would come back as you.”–Robert Bruton 

What to learn before you throw plan-b out:

  1. Activity vs. Productivity, learn the difference!
  2. Resources vs. Resourcefulness.
  3. Failure, delays, obstacles, on the other side, is your success.
  4. Unwavering faith!
  5. Visualize, see yourself already having achieved your goal.
  6. Gratitude, be grateful where you are now and grateful for what is coming.

Learn to master these few things, and you will rocket ship your success.

Now go out there and find your new life!

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Take Constant and Immediate Action do the Work

“Infuse your life with action. Don’t wait for it to happen. Make it happen. Make your own future. Make your own hope. Make your own love. And whatever your beliefs, honor your creator, not by passively waiting for grace to come down from upon high, but by doing what you can to make grace happen… yourself, right now, right down here on Earth.”–Bradley Whitford

What a powerful statement. We indeed have to move, take action, get going, run Forest run, and you will find God moving your life in ways never dreamt.

A critical piece of this puzzle stay in faith and don’t impose your will over anything. You can do the work God has put in your heart. We achieve that knowledge in prayer and meditation. Learn to quiet your mind so that you’re able to receive what God is placing in your heart to do.

meditate, prayer, hope

When times get challenging, and you don’t feel God is communicating with you. Stay in faith. Keep in mind changes ahead of you may have components that have to play out first before you can receive the help you need. So don’t be discouraged when you run up on delays. It’s merely the Universe moving people, places or things around that are necessary.

Many of us would be discouraged and give up. We can’t foretell our future, you must yield to optimism that although you can’t see the construction ahead it is indeed happening and with patience, you will soon see. All will be well and off you go!

The key to success in any endeavor is you must do the work before you. No matter what happens if you’re not doing the work, nothing will move. You can say okay God I want to make One Million Dollars this year, sit down, order a pizza and wait. Sorry! Not going to happen.

You have to get off your butt and move. Whatever, you set out in this life to achieve, you will have to work for it. Nothing comes easy that you really want and nothing comes free. No magic bullet, other than work, faith, patience, and a positive attitude that you will achieve. Only with this steadfast commitment will you win.

No matter what gets thrown at you don’t quit. Just when you left because the circumstance gets in physical appearance hopeless, that is about the time God will provide what you need if you don’t give up. The enemy will tell you it’s useless and you cannot finish this out. Don’t for one minute believe it if you genuinely want to finish this quest.

On the other side of your pain, despair, and hopeless thoughts, your SUCCESS!

“Success isn’t always about greatness. It’s about consistency. Consistent hard work leads to success. Greatness will come.”–Dwayne Johnson

Keep your eye focused on what you can do today. Don’t worry about tomorrow or what’s behind you. Train yourself to be present at the moment and take care of today. Do this and success in many forms is yours!

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