Business, family

Family, I’m too Busy with Work

It’s your paycheck that pays for the care of your family. If you didn’t work the hours that you do, weekend and so on, life just wouldn’t be possible. You work hard to provide for your family entirely admirable. For years I thought the same thing.

If you’re so busy, you have no time for your family what the hell kind of life is that? It’s not a life because someday when your son or daughter is grown up you will be regretting the time lost. You can cloud this up all you want but the day will come. So let’s figure out how to manage work and life balance.

family, business, work

The first big hurdle to cross is the boss that says “sure you can go watch your kids’ ball game just pack this box with all your shit.” I actually have had several bosses who played that card. This I will admit is a tight position to find yourself in.

An even tougher thought to ponder is to say you do succeed, but you’ve missed every first thing, birthdays, and life events with your children. How do you ever get that back? You don’t! A very perplexing situation to find oneself.

We all want to get ahead in life, we want to give our family more than what we had. The problem is the cost. What are we willing to pay. From experience, I paid a lot. More than I should have because I missed a great many things. My son ounce sent me a picture of a child chasing a Dad, the bottom photo was the Dad chasing the child. Sad!

One damn sure thing you can never do; buy your child’s happiness or love. What you can provide is you! So how to find the balance?

Begin by making sure you make time every day if possible that you leave your phone, emails, and laptops. Allow yourself to be totally present in a moment with your child. Don’t answer the phone and say Daddy or Mommy has to take this. Don’t dismiss your child as you would a co-worker.

Finding balance requires you to be completely present at the moment. You want to sell yourself that a client can’t wait an hour to hear from you (I get time-sensitive jobs, but you need to find a time when the market is closed, see my point). Spending uninterrupted time with your children, time with them while you are on the phone is NO GOOD! Block out time that is the children’s time!

Some will say this is a nieve look at job vs. family. That it’s your job that pays for your families life. If you asked one adult child, who’s parents gave them an incredible home, everything they could ever want. If you asked that child what if anything could you change, all would tell you more time with the parent that was absent. You can’t buy a family or love.

Make real-time for kids to experience what you have to offer. Maybe you can’t be there all the time, but be present in the moment. Don’t miss firsts or birthdays! You can never get them back; I don’t care how many birthday ponies you give. Turn off phones and be with your kids! You won’t regret you did, ever!

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family, spiritual

Five Things to be Grateful For

Many days we all struggle to find things to be grateful for. Learning to become grateful during our worst times will help you find peace. Focus on the positive things in your life, get that vibration out in the universe. Draw in the great kick out the bad!

five things to be grateful for

Here are 5 quick things to be grateful for today:

  1. You woke up; you’re This is a tell-tale sign that God is not through with you yet. Why not get up and go see what God has for your life.
  2. Do you have healthy children, are you healthy, if so consider the flip side of that coin? Many families will leave loved ones behind today in hospitals to never return home. If you have your health, you genuinely have everything!
  3. Do you have a job and transportation to get to your career? Even if it’s a job, you cannot stand, you have a job. Lots of folks would kill for your crappy job. So be grateful you can work and provide for your family.
  4. If you’re reading this from a computer, chances are it’s on a device you can be grateful to have. Plenty of folks out there that cannot understand this only because they have no access. If you have a cell phone, computer, tablet, and Be grateful that you have these items that most likely you take for granted.
  5. Family, do you have anyone in your family that you are genuinely grateful they’re in your life? Hopefully, its most of your family, but if it’s a Mom, Dad, sibling or child. Let that person or persons know how grateful you are to the family. An I love you goes a long way!

No matter how crappy life may be or how joy-filled life may be for you right now. Being grateful is powerful. See the world through grateful eyes, and you will see a world that blossoms for you in ways you never imagined.

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Today I am grateful you read this and pray Joy and Peace into your life! God Bless.

family, spiritual

Our Words Cut or Heal

“Words which do not give the light of Christ increase the darkness.” — Mother Teresa

Words have power and what you say out of your mouth can alter what is happening to you. If we speak negatively, that is what we will attract in our life. Positive words can heal, bring peace to our survival. Ask yourself to have you ever been around a negative person and just wanted to run away? The bigger question is, are you that person?

For me, this was and still is to a degree something I must work for change. Keeping negative words from racing through my head or spilling out of my mouth is a challenge. For most of us, it’s a challenge. If our lives have been a struggle most of the time, then this will prove to be work. Rest easy it’s good work!

When we learn to be gentle with our speech amazing positive things will happen in our life. Words have healing power. If you don’t believe that why does a child respond to your soft loving voice vs. a loud, forceful yell? Being honest with yourself have you ever said something you regretted saying? Of course, you have we all have at some point in our life.

More than any other area of our life this chapter will be in the top two of importance.

For years I would think negatively about so many things in my life. Especially about myself. To only drag me down but it attracted despair. We must learn to change the discussion that we have with yourself. Instead of “nothing ever works” “my life is total crap” start saying, “my life is blessed.”

self help, family, words

One thing I had a hard time buying into, was words could change my life. Words alone will not, but words with action behind them most certainly will. You can’t say I want a movie star spouse to sit on the couch and expect it to come to pass.

Nope, you will have to get off your butt and do something besides just talk. So, if you say, for example, I want to walk with God, be happy, then you might want to get to Church. You will also need to make these confessions to God on a regular basis. Until it comes naturally to you praying daily. When what you say is what you believe. Then hang on your life is about to change in surprising ways.

Let me forewarn you the enemy will come here with your positive thought, speech and see you become happy. “Incoming” enemy bombs are coming! The enemy will want to deceive you. Now he is afraid of you, what God will do in your life if you begin to speak with grace.  The attack will come hard! Dig in and confess you are strong that the enemy has NO dominion over your life.

Your head will deceive you, your heart, soul, will not. Trust in your spiritual belief over your noodle. The enemy lives in your head; God lives in your heart. For years I thought God didn’t like me that is why I suffered. Therefore, now I implore you to hear what I am saying. The enemy will attack hard; you can get through no matter how much you want to give up, DON’T! I promise it gets more comfortable with faith. Don’t lose it.

At the beginning of really focusing on changing my speech. Even though many times I didn’t believe the words I was saying. I said the words anyway. You will be amazed at how quickly saying positive things about yourself, where you begin to believe. Strength comes when you speak power to your soul. For a time if you don’t have faith in your words, say the words. Pray for guidance, and you will receive it.

No matter how difficult a time you’re having with positive thoughts. Keep speaking peaceful words to yourself. I cannot reiterate enough. The power lies in our speech. If you confess negativity, then expect the same garbage to manifest itself to you.

Here is a thought! Forgive yourself, remember these words “my past does not define who I can be today.” What I struggled with was forgiving myself for all the past things in my life that I was not proud of doing. Feeling undeserving of happiness. If this is you, stop it, your life does and has real meaning. Mistakes in life are NOT life sentences of despair.

It has taken me a lot of pain to get this point across in my head. It’s still a battle for me, but I am working on being gentle in my speech to myself. What I can tell you is it does get better and more comfortable to receive the words. I may have to say to myself repeatedly. Worth my time and effort. It will be for you as well. Commit right now that today you will be gentle in your conversation with yourself.

The same way you must be gentle in conversation with yourself. Be sincere with others in your life. Words we speak to our children, spouse or other loved ones will dictate our experience with them. One thing I have had to do with my son tells him I was sorry for telling him when he did wrong that he was terrible. His activity was awful; my son was just off the track.

In the how to raise a child owner’s manual that gets lost between the hospital and home. It would be nice to find the section that talks about the power of words. Breaking the generational cycle of garbage that gets handed down because of words stops now. For us to have a well-rounded life, we may have to have conversations with family to end the cycle of negative words.

My endeavor every day is to speak only uplifting, positive words. I choose to talk about peace in my life. No, it doesn’t work all the time, but that does not mean I don’t try anyway. When we stumble, that means we’re human. Mistakes will happen, recognizing them is a beautiful thing. Now you can adjust your course and get back on track.

Success with our words will take practice and most importantly patience with yourself. Negative words will pop up in your head fast. Confusing you in a false sense, it can manifest if you focus towards negativity. Like all things it takes practice. You don’t walk onto the Golf course with Tiger Woods and expect to beat him if you have not practiced as he has. Your game won’t be the same if you have not paid the same price he has.

The enemy will want you to stay status quo. Break the cycle of negative words in your mind and blurting negative words out of your mouth. Apologize to yourself and to anyone who is the subject of your foul mouth exercise. Bluntly speaking we all must curb our tongue on occasion. Be a blessing to someone, not a curse.

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spiritual

Grateful, Are you?

Grateful. If anything in this life can make it better, being grateful is number one. If you can’t be thankful for what you have then sadly you may be stuck.

Let me give you a prime example. Finances could not be worse. Relationships are in the toilet, you’re about to lose everything. I mean everything. Life looks hopeless. Every turn is some new problem, nothing is getting better. What do you have to be grateful for if life seems like it’s flushing you down the toilet?

• Health, if reasonably healthy then indeed you are blessed. If you don’t believe that tell it to someone that has just been diagnosed with terminal cancer. Ask them if health is not everything.

• The ability to work. If you can stand upright, you have a body that functions you can accomplish. This is something to be grateful for.

• Children healthy? That is a real gift.

• Supportive spouse. A right partner is a beautiful blessing.

• A car that runs to get you to work. A bus that is close to getting you to work.

If you look closely enough, we all have things to put gratitude in our hearts. Without it, you will stifle your growth. With it, God will enrich your life. I see it every day in my own life. When I live in gratitude things happen for me out of the blue. A small break here, a big break there. At the end of the day, I feel stronger. The trials in my life may still be there, but every day I take a bite out of them.

The key is to be grateful for even the smallest blessing. How can God bless your life if you don’t thank him for even the most minor blessing? It’s still a blessing. I received $16 in cash from the post office for a PO box I had. I owe thousands of dollars I could have looked at this a couple of ways. I chose to be excited it was something I was not expecting, out of the blue favor from God.

Today if God saw fit to bless me with a penny I would be just as excited if he saw fit to bestow me with a thousand dollars. Be grateful for the smallest things, then God can bless you with the big stuff. It has to be genuine though. Don’t be smarty pants and say “Oh look a penny.” Be seeded in faith and gratitude.

This is an area that I struggle as well. Everything you read from successful people is grateful for what you have. Look around you. We all have things to be thankful for. Blessings come disguised as a smile from a complete stranger, someone allows you in front of them, you can breathe, your health, I could list hundreds more.

Don’t let yourself get caught up in a whirlwind of garbage to the point you forget to be grateful. Blessings could be just around the bend if you stop and just say thank you. Even when finding anything to be thankful for seems distant or hopeless.

Try! I will pray for anyone reading this that you find one small blessing in your life, that being grateful for the most minor of blessings will open the door for God to do amazing things in your life.

self help, god, faith

family

Out of the Blue from YOU

Okay everyone today is a challenge, a fun challenge for you to do.

When you get home today to your family. I want you to for no reason at all grab your spouse hug them like you’ve never hugged them before. The question flying out of the mouth of your spouse “what’s this all about”?

The answer needs to come from your heart. Be grateful you have someone that is your spouse. Remember the moment you fell in love with that person. Take that love energy and release that connection in your hug. Feel the energy of your bodies embraced in a simple hug. Let that person know you feel blessed, happy and in love.Family, love, kids, spouse

If you have kids, get them off a game and do the same. Hug them like you’ve never hugged them before. Let them feel your love and how special they are to you.

Do this with NO expectation. Just LOVE your family for no other reason than LOVE.

Take your cell phone and turn it off. Be present at the moment. Don’t ask about work, how was your day. Just look your family in the eye and just say I love you! That’s it, that’s all. I know in my heart this will be a fantastic experience.

A beautiful surprise is when you can be totally present at the moment and show true love. We get busy, frustrated with life, the list goes on. Take time tonight when you get home to remind your spouse and kids if you have them. How much they truly mean to you. Express your love.

We need to remember kindness, love, and a connectedness to our significant loved ones. I am guilty of not recognizing to be present at the moment with my family. To allow life’s stresses to come home with me. We all do it. Tonight surprise your family, even if it’s just your pet, show them, extra special love, today.

I want to hear stories, so I hope you will come back and share.