Life Detox

This is the first chapter of Life Detox. How we can cleanse, mind, body, and soul. Sometimes it’s just time to rip off the bandaid and be done with it! Choose to begin anew!

Chapter 1 

Why 

“I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game-winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”—Michael Jordan

Perfection is not the goal; persistence is our focus. 

You’ve all heard you need to find your way. True but, in this scenario, the why needs to be you’re sick-and-tired-of-being-sick-and-tired! Enough is enough. Well, I can tell you that over a year ago, that is where I found myself. 

(Get a pad of paper to do some writing) To make any lasting change, grab the paper! 

Here are some questions you need to ask yourself:

 

  • Is your life where you hoped it would be right now?

 

  • Are you depressed most of the time?
  • Are you merely going through the paces of daily life with no real direction, work, go home, that’s about all?
  • Are you unhappy? Why?
  • If money, time, education, depression were not the problem. What would fulfill your life?

 

 

Please take the time to put some real thought into the questions. If you follow along this way, we can save you a great deal of time. 

You must get very clear on what you would like to see your life become. One of the biggest epiphanies I’ve experienced don’t worry about the HOW, set your sail to the horizon of where you want your life. 

Imagine getting on a boat for a long journey. You set sail, and off you go. Along the way, you most assuredly will face rough seas. When you begin the rough journey seas, severe weather is not part of the equation when you decided to set sail. 

The end destination is more important than how we get there! If you had a chance to visit some beautiful faraway island, once in a lifetime opportunity. Would you not go because you MIGHT run into bad weather? Did you not go because you thought the how was more difficult — focusing on the “what if’s” instead of the outcome? 

Logic would suggest you have a plan that includes how. So how do you plot this course change in life without knowing how you’re going to traverse the course to a destination. When you set out on any journey let’s say a storm comes up, do you sail directly through it? No, you may have to recalibrate a new route. 

My point is you don’t know all the “how’s” that will change your course unexpectedly. However, if you worry yourself before you set sail, you’ll stifle any chance of real change! 

I can hear you! “How do you not worry about how?” These are bullet points that will explain: 

 

  • Have a clear definition of the result. Know what you want clearly! 

 

  • Learn to meditate on the result you desire, see it in your mind’s eye. Feel in every part of your being what it would feel like to have achieved that which you want most. 
  • Have unwavering faith it will happen. A prayer might sound like “God you know what I desire in my heart, I have faith you will provide everything I need for that, what you put in my heart to achieve. I don’t know how we will do this; I trust you have the way.
  • Pray for wisdom and guidance.
  • Set realistic expectations. Reach to be sure.

 

 

How to turn from wishful thinking to ACTION:

 

  • What is one step you can take right now to begin your journey? Forget the words significant steps, little steps. Every step forward creates forward momentum. 

 

  • Learn the difference between activity vs. productivity. 
  • Learn to plan your day for production — set reminders for tasks that produce results. Stay on task!
  • Take time to research and put into action what you learn to achieve your desire. Fill yourself as though you’re filling a pitcher with knowledge.
  • When self-doubt and the like hit your noodle, remember this, whatever negative thoughts you’re having it’s temporary. Work through it even when you think you cannot.

 

 

The how will come to you. Take steps every day, and you will begin to gain momentum. 

“When you begin to worry, go find something to do. Get busy being a blessing to someone; do something fruitful. Talking about your problem or sitting alone, thinking about it does no good! It serves only to make you miserable. Above all else, remember that worrying is useless. Worrying will not solve your problem.”–Joyce Meyer

A struggle for everyone.  When everything in your life is overwhelmingly worrisome. So how do we get through that?

When you begin to realize that no matter what you’re going through in life, it’s temporary. If you get flustered stifling any sort of progress the situation stalls or gets worse.

Begin to look at trials and tribulations as a coaching exercise. Learn to realize God is coaching you to become a world-class you! What do coaches do? They train you to go beyond what you believe you can do. Stretch yourself beyond your limiting beliefs.

Life is changing for me. I don’t look at difficulties as a problem, but a learning experience is preparing me to handle anything life can throw at me. Yes, at times, you can feel alone, lost, and defeated. At this moment I think of myself as running dead last in a race. I can choose to fail, or I can run my heart out and win.

God is merely working all of us out. He is training us to handle anything the enemy can throw to disrupt our life. Why can’t God fix my life? He is trying by letting you work through the pain to strengthen your resolve.

It hurts I can’t do it! God never puts more on our plate than we can handle. Hard to understand, but here is the skinny. Get through this because on the other side of pain is your destiny. Bigger and brighter than you can imagine.

Change the way you look at problems. They’re not happening at you they’re happing for you!

Here are some exercises you can do to change your state-of-mind: Crank up some music that gets you dancing. Music can immediately improve your state and put a smile on your face. 

 

  • Breathe. Take 60 seconds or so and breathe in through the nose and out through the mouth, beautiful and relaxing. 

 

  • Pray — nothing like a good prayer. You can hand God the garbage he is ready to be a blessing to you and carry it out. 
  • Meditate. Find the right place to meditate and relax your mind and body.

 

 

Take a walk. Get outdoors and walk to help relieve muscle stress. Throw on some headphones and good music. Change your state-of-mind, and you will change your life. 

Time outdoors can be incredibly cathartic to the soul. Taking in nature, walking by a river, standing on the beach, anywhere that God has touched the landscape. You can look up and happily say to God, “show off.” Smiling in awe of the world around you. 

When you can take these moments to find clarity in your head, good thoughts, new ideas, and fresh perspectives will become the norm. 

One thing that I did put up a bird-feeder. Birds are incredibly funny and beautiful to watch. I have found myself sitting for long periods just enjoying my birds and clearing my head when I’m not trying — just enjoying the moment.

eBook, Self Improvement, Happiness

 

Available on Amazon Kindle

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God Is Your Coach

My new book, God is Your Coach out in Paperback and available on Kindle.

Take a look at chapter one:

Chapter 1

The Title Fight

In this corner, wearing depression, despair, and no hope Me!

In the black corner wearing out my life, the enemy!

The enemy will work to keep you sufficiently depressed so that you won’t take steps towards a new life. The attack can come in many forms, depression, self-doubt, or just merely giving in that this won’t work. Hogwash!

Change comes at a price. We’ve all heard the adage; nothing in this life is free. Nothing worth having is free. A beautiful life is worth the price we will pay to enjoy. There is hope, and it will come. However, we do have to navigate some attacks on our life.

As change begins to take hold in our life, smiles on our face, a pep in our step and peace in our mind. Everything appears to be moving nicely. All the sudden the rug gets pulled out from under our feet and smash we go.

The first thing that comes to us is excellent “this doesn’t work.” I knew it, I knew it, I knew it! Precisely what the enemy wants you to believe. Loser, failure, and nothing you will try will work. All lies! Here is the rub, stay in faith. What??? I can hear you screaming. Will get to this further in the book, keep going.

Spiritual warfare for those of you new to a Christian life can disenchant most from staying with God. As humans, we tend to allow pain to numb our senses in a way that we accept a sort of mediocrity for our lives. Sad! How the enemy keeps us leashed — never allowing us to wander off too far.

You’re not too old, too weak, too young, or any other moniker you can place to defeat yourself. Are you not tired of kicking your ass? I know I was and that has prompted this book.

Beginning this process, you will come out swinging. Strong bold, and you feel that you can conquer the world. Then you take a shot to the gut that puts you right to the ground. Everything starts falling apart; all your work seems to be running down the drain.

Depression and self-doubt overtake your mind. Spiritual warfare has arrived. Keep in mind that trials and tribulations can take on any negative form. We’re using these analogies to set an expectation that whatever form attacks take they’re relentless.

Here are a couple of things you can do to help you with immediate changes in your state-of-mind:

  1. Take 60 seconds and breathe. Cleansing breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth. Breathing will relax tension.
  2. Get outside and walk to the end of the block. Walking will relieve tension. Focus on the beauty around you.
  3. If you can get to a quiet place to meditate, relax your mind. Good, contemplate music.
  4. You can almost immediately change your state of mind listening to music that moves you. Music is incredibly healing at the moment. Get your feet to move.

Changing your state-of-mind can bring peace. Everything is going to be okay; you have to get your head there. The preceding was temp solutions to get your head out of a dark place.

No matter the obstacles in your life, they’re all temporary. Think about some hard-times in your life. If you’re past them, something terrible that happened ten years ago, that at the time seemed devastating. You must see, you’re still here, everything is most likely calmer, settled and most importantly over. The monster is defeated.

This next part of the chapter is one of two articles I have written and included in this eBook that I think help bolster the message I want to get across in this eBook. Bits and pieces may be redundant, but I trust you will overlook that to receive the news.

When your feet hit the floor in the morning, let the Devil say, “Oh Shit He’s up!”

Our minds can exhaust us to the point we feel like we’ve been in a heavyweight title fight. Pardon the cliché, but you are sick and tired of being sick and tired. What I want to prepare you for is the title fight that is coming. The enemy will see a change in you for good. All the sudden, you went from being depressed to having hope.

Jesus paid for your sins on the cross. I am not going to pretend to be a theologian and quote scripture. What I did do is start attending a great Bible-based church. Began to study the word of God. You have protection from the enemy; you can yourself cast him out of your head (No you’re not Reagan McNeil from the Exorcist). God supplies all the tools you need. You must show up for work.

Part of your job will be to follow the path I am laying down. Find an excellent Bible-based Church. Not hard to find and you may need to attend a couple before you see one that you feel is home. You will need the tools, and foundation for Christ to win the fight to come.

The enemy will come at you hard. WHY, because he is afraid to lose you to the right side. He wants your soul; he wants you to fail! You have free will so that it will become a choice. I would cry so hard thinking God seems pissed at me for all the things I have done in my life and losing hope that God wanted nothing to do with me. NOT TRUE! Learning from the study, Church and the Bible God loves me. It is the enemy that has the hold on us, not God. Rest easy dear friends. It is good and evil in this world it took me a while to understand. Sharing this first thing will sound a bit scary. You will have a better understanding that the difficulties to come are manageable with the right tools. God says, “No weapon formed against me will prosper.” Remember you have all the promises the Bible says we have. You must start believing with unwavering faith. God wants you to think about it before you receive it. Try it; this is where I stumbled hard.

Friends would tell me that God will never give you more than you can handle. I hated hearing that. The problem is it’s true. You can’t fight for the heavyweight championship of the world without getting knocked on your backside a few times. You will find the strength just as I did. Even from the darkest depths of your mind, a path to peace is available for anyone who seeks order.

Women readers who are moms can relate to this. Labor pains are excruciating, but the result is the greatest joy of your life. Once you go through labor and deliver yourself from hell, you’ve created in your head. The sooner the greatest joy in your life will be at hand.

Remembering always that the enemy will fill your mind with doubt, fear, this will never work. What happens is when you believe you’ll quit. Then the enemy wins. The only loser in this fight is you. It may seem as though God is not listening to you. He is, I thought this so many times. I would scream at God in my vehicle “get in the game” why are you forsaking me. He is not; the devil is treacherous in your mind.

You will learn to live with your soul, not your head. The mind will never win over your destiny. What you can control is how quickly you see your future reveal itself. Frustration, hate, anger, despair will only cause you to delay your life moving forward. You must begin to see yourself happy, joyous, and free of pain. Don’t scream, “I can’t do it.” If you do, you’re right. None of this is easy to hear; I get that!

What I am telling you is if you get knocked down get up. Tell yourself NOT THIS TIME; I get to win this time. Get that loser mentality out of your head. It won’t come all at once. You must recondition your mind for good. If you have suffered for a long-time change won’t happen overnight.

The mind will fight you to the point of utter exhaustion during a marathon where you will hit the wall many times. Just like marathon runners, you convince yourself that it’s a mind trick; it’s not your reality. Reality is you already have, peace, love, and happiness. We as Christians must learn to accept it. You think acceptance would be easy, for most it’s not. Stay in faith even when you don’t seem to have confidence in anything. Tell God you don’t see a way, but you trust he will make a move!

One of the most important things I can tell you. Don’t help God, don’t impose your will on a situation that needs Gods hand not yours — for example, separated from your spouse. It’s a situation that you did not want, hit you out of the blue and you’re heartbroken. You call your spouse saying I promise I will change; I love you, please let’s work it out. That’s imposing your will. It’s not you are helping even though you think you’re fighting for your marriage. STOP!

If you want to trust God for a change in your life follow along in this book, I share what mistakes I made so you can have greater insight. You need to believe that God is handling the heart of both you and your spouse. You are jumping in does not help. Trust that if you give your marriage to God, asking him for his will be done. Someone asked me two questions:

Do you want a perfect, loving, happy marriage?

Do you want your spouse back with no change?

Relationships meant to be will be. Maybe, God is moving this person out of your life to make room for your deep down in your soul exact right person to appear when we let our destiny unfold naturally what a blessed life we will have.

It’s not always easy to see clearly during times of adversity. Remember we’re in a title fight for our life. The enemy will put horrible, terrible things in our head or before us. We can get betrayed; our life shattered into pieces.

How you get up and tell the enemy “that’s all you got” I have the power of God almighty who controls my life. A quote I love, “when your feet hit the floor in the morning, the Devil says oh shit he’s up. “Anything beats living a life of misery. It’s where I am at, and I pray you are too. Now is our time and “I ain’t going down no more”—Rocky Balboa

The fight will come hard, but if you keep reading, you will find the help you need to get up and fight even harder. The tools you will learn will make those fights fewer. Your spiritual armor will see you through.

Stay strong because God is getting ready to show out in your life in ways you could never have imagined. Your blessings are on the other side of this battle; what was meant for your harm God will bless your life in ways that only he can.

The stronger the attack, the bigger the blessing. Crazy, but when you get kicked right in the gut hard. When you walk trusting God, you know, he is getting you ready to show out in your life! The pain you may encounter along the way in strengthening your resolve. Helping you be able to face anything the enemy throws in your approach to disrupt your life.

Everything I am writing about what I have experienced. So, if you’re saying what does this guy know about my pain, he won’t understand what I’m going through in my life. It’s because I’ve lived it same as you.  I choose not to lose any more! Hope you come along!

Are you ready for some good news?

What if you could look at all this doom & gloom as coaching experience. That with a different perspective to life’s challenges you could get through with expectations of winning. You’re excited to face these challenges with a new open mind. You believe now that you will win no matter the obstacles.

Well, friends get ready for chapter two because you are about to learn how to WIN!

To purchase this book click the cover to visit Amazon:

book, ebook, God is your coach

Conflict in your Head Getting Rid of It

“Conflict cannot survive without your participation.”–Wayne Dyer

What I loved about Wayne Dyer is his ability to evolve his spiritual awareness. He was open to receive the grace of the universe, God.

The quote rings so true for me. Conflict in my head is what slows me down. Not taking the time to resolve my thoughts to accept what is and faith for what will be.

prayer, bible, self help

Staying in faith that God will work through my life if I just let him. I’m terrible about hanging onto the past. Mistakes that we make are not life sentences of internal pain. This exists when we participate in that conflict.

Letting go of it is not easy for some. We get okay with pain, wallow in our own self-loathing. Begging the question, how do we stop this behavior?

Learning to forgive yourself is where I started. Throughout my life, I have chosen unwisely many times. Costing me relationships, especially with family. How you can resolve yourself is to not do the old behavior. Live life as a better you!

Don’t accept the status quo!   

Today I don’t live as I did in the past. After enough loss in my life, what the hell us could I do? So you dive in and learn to live a life that YOU can be proud of. A secure measuring stick is to ask yourself when you’re doing something “would grandma approve?” When you are doing anything, we all know right from wrong!

This cliche when you have arrived at this place in your mind; “Sick and Tired of being Sick and Tired.” Crying, depressed, or ready to give up? DO NOT!

Change can hurt, change can take time. On the other side of change is the life God promises you will have. It’s not just going to happen this moment we all have to do the work. It’s so worth it!

Hurt comes in many forms. So this article applies if you’ve suffered loss from divorce, death, betrayal, or any number of things that were out of your control.

The pain you are going through is not as significant as how you deal with it. Learning to deal with our grief healthily takes work. It’s worth the time and effort necessary to change old paradigms. The promise of life, happiness, and joy exist.

I can hear you screaming, Okay, how:

  1. Throw everything in your head up to God. Pray and confess everything negative in your life. Let him know you are ready for a change.
  2. Breathe. Take time every day to just stop and breathe. Don’t say this is stupid until you actually try. I thought to breathe whatever. Just take a minute or two only and breathe.
  3. Learn to meditate. It’s super easy!
  4. Get toxic people out of your life. Don’t listen to someone’s poisonous bile. You control the person you are, not someone else.
  5. Patience. Nothing worth having comes overnight. Go at your pace, JUST GO. This is not a contest. Do things every day that help moves your life forward. Some days big stips, somedays small steps. Forward motion is always a good thing.

Okay, so five things to get you started. Now it’s your turn. GET STARTED!

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Get Ready for a Spiritual Title Fight

When your feet hit the floor in the morning, let the Devil say, “Oh Shit He’s up!”

Our minds can exhaust us to the point we feel like we’ve been in a heavyweight title fight. Pardon the cliché, but you are sick and tired of being sick and tired. What I want to prepare you for is the title fight that is coming. The enemy will see a change in you for good. All the sudden you went from being depressed to having hope.

Jesus paid for your sins on the cross. I am not going to pretend to be a theologian and quote scripture. What I did do is start attending a great Bible-based church. Began to study the word of God. You have protection from the enemy; you can yourself cast him out of your head (No you’re not Reagan McNeil from the Exorcist). God supplies all the tools you need. You must show up for work.

 Part of your job will be to follow the path I am laying down. Find an excellent Bible-based Church. Not hard to find and you may need to attend a couple before you see one that you feel is home. You will need the tools, and foundation for Christ to win the fight to come.

The enemy will come at you hard. WHY, because he is afraid to lose you to the right side. He wants your soul; he wants you to fail! You have free will so that it will become a choice. I would cry so hard thinking God seems pissed at me for all the things I have done in my life. Losing hope that God wanted anything to do with me. NOT TRUE! Learning from the study, Church and the Bible God loves me. It is the enemy that has the hold on us, not God. Rest easy dear friends. It is good and evil in this world it took me a while to understand.

prayer,pray,family

Sharing this first thing will sound a bit scary. You will have a better understanding that the difficulties to come are manageable with the right tools. God says, “No weapon formed against me will prosper.” Remember you have all the promises the Bible says we have. You must start believing with unwavering faith. God wants you to think about it before you receive it. Try it; this is where I stumbled hard.

Friends would tell me that God will never give you more than you can handle. I hated hearing that. The problem is it’s true. You can’t fight for the heavyweight championship of the world without getting knocked on your backside a few times. You will find the strength just as I did. Even from the darkest depths of your mind, a path to peace is available for anyone who seeks order.

Women readers who are moms can relate to this. Labor pains are excruciating, but the result is the greatest joy of your life. Once you go through labor and deliver yourself from hell, you’ve created in your head. The sooner the greatest joy in your life will be at hand.

Remembering always that the enemy will fill your mind with doubt, fear, this will never work. What happens is when you believe you’ll quit. Then the enemy wins. The only loser in this fight is you. It may seem as though God is not listening to you. He is, I thought this so many times. I would scream at God in my vehicle “get in the game” why are you forsaking me. He is not; the devil is treacherous in your mind.

 You will learn to live with your soul, not your head. The mind will never win over your destiny. What you can control is how quickly you see your future reveal itself. Frustration, hate, anger, despair, will only cause you to delay your life moving forward. You must begin to see yourself happy, joyous and free of pain. Don’t scream “I can’t do it.” If you do, you’re right. None of this is easy to hear; I get that!

What I am telling you is if you get knocked down get up. Tell yourself NOT THIS TIME; I get to win this time. Get that loser mentality out of your head. It won’t come all at once. You must recondition your mind for good. If you have suffered for a long-time change won’t happen overnight.

The mind will fight you to the point of utter exhaustion. During a marathon where you will hit the wall many times. Just like marathon runners, you convince yourself that it’s a mind trick it’s not your reality. Reality is you already have, peace, love, and happiness. We as Christians must learn to accept it. You think acceptance would be easy, for most it’s not. Stay in faith even when you don’t seem to have faith in anything. Tell God you don’t see a way, but you trust he will make a move!

One of the most important things I can tell you. Don’t help God, don’t impose your will on a situation that needs Gods hand not yours. For example, separated from your spouse. It’s a situation that you did not want, hit you out of the blue and you’re heartbroken. You call your spouse saying I promise I will change; I love you, please let’s work it out. That’s imposing your will. It’s not you are helping even though you think you’re fighting for your marriage. STOP!

If you want to trust God for a change in your life follow along in this book, I share what mistakes I made so you can have greater insight. You need to believe that God is handling the heart of both you and your spouse. You are jumping in does not help. Trust that if you give your marriage to God, asking him for his will be done. Someone asked me two questions:

  1. Do you want a perfect, loving, happy marriage?
  2. Do you want your spouse back with no change?

Relationships meant to be will be. Maybe, God is moving this person out of your life to make room for your deep down in your soul dream come true person to appear. When we let our destiny unfold naturally what a blessed life we will have.

It’s not always easy to see clearly during times of adversity. Remember we’re in a title fight for our life. The enemy will put horrible, terrible things in our head or before us. We can get betrayed; our life shattered into pieces.

How you get up and tell the enemy “that’s all you got” I have the power of God almighty who controls my life. A quote I love, “when your feet hit the floor in the morning, the Devil says oh shit he’s up. “Anything beats living a life of misery. It’s where I am at, and I pray you are too. Now is our time and “I ain’t going down no more”—Rocky Balboa

The fight will come hard, but if you keep reading, you will find the help you need to get up and fight even harder. The tools you will learn will make those fights fewer. Your spiritual armor will see you through.

self help, advice

Stay strong because God is getting ready to show out in your life in ways you could never have imagined. Your blessings are on the other side of this battle; what was meant for your harm God will bless your life in ways that only he can.

The stronger the attack, the bigger the blessing. Crazy, but when you get kicked right in the gut hard. When you walk trusting God you know, he is getting you ready to show out in your life! The pain you may encounter along the way in strengthening your resolve. Helping you be able to face anything the enemy throws in your approach to disrupt your life.

Everything I am writing about I have experienced. So, if you’re saying what does this guy know about my pain, he won’t understand what I’m going through in my life. It’s because I’ve lived it same as you.  I choose not to lose any more! Hope you come along!

Buy Me A Coffee