Patience is the Key, Blessings, Success, and Life

“Patience is not simply the ability to wait – it’s how we behave while we’re waiting.”–Joyce Meyer 
Letting God do his work takes time. Patience allows God to see your faith, that you trust enough to allow your life’s destiny to open up as it should. When you lose faith because times get tough slows the progress.

self help, happy, peace

We all struggle with patience because we want everything right now. Living in a world that wants us to believe now, now, now!

The struggle is we don’t see an outcome being positive quickly enough then our first instinct is to jump in the middle of something that needs time. Yes, you have to do the work, what’s necessary to move things along.

There is a difference in taking steps to realize a change, or forcing something that is not altogether ready to manifest. For example, a relationship you push too hard when you push someone away because you don’t give them the time and space to come to the same place you are.

Worse still is you merely give up. “Oh this is not going to work, or it would have by now.” The Universe will align the sun, the moon and the stars in your favor with Patience. Remember you cannot say I want a new job and then order a pizza and wait. You have to get out and do the work, look for a job, interview and keep chugging until you here “Welcome we want to hire you.”

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Six Facts about Meditation that aren’t True

If you have never tried meditation because you have some preconceived notion about beginning a meditation practice. It’s time to get the real facts.

Excuses to try or do anything in this life won’t serve you well at all. Don’t assume to understand something without having a clear understanding. You’ve heard the old cliche “Don’t judge a book by its cover.”

peace, happy, love, joy

Also, preconceived notions never pan out to what you believe, chances are it’s something you’re hearing or fear. Either way, it’s bad form to embrace the negativity.

Here are some misconceptions about meditation: 

  1. Meditation is a Buddhist religious practice, “I’m not a Buddhist.” 
  2. I have to chant or do another embarrassing ritual. 
  3. I cannot clear my mind enough to relax.
  4. I don’t have the time! 
  5. I’m not a religious person, meditation is spiritual.
  6. It’s “hocus-pocus.” 

You may have other reason to not try or think you cannot meditate. I’m here to tell you meditation can change your life. It’s easy to do and you can with practice you too can find yourself loving to meditate.

Now let’s talk about an easy way to get started:

  1. If you’re like me trying to quiet the mind can seem a daunting challenge. Try using headphones with meditation music. If you focus on the music, slow your breathing in through the nose out through the mouth. Finding tranquility is a few music bars away. 
  2. Finding good meditation music, I use YouTube®. 
  3. One of the best places to meditate is sitting or lying in a quiet area (don’t fall asleep). Choose a spot where there will be no disruptions. This can be a challenge with children. With younger children practice your meditation during nap times or after bedtimes. Older children let them know you need some time with no interruption, they can go out and play. 
  4. As you move forward, taking a minute in your office chair, sitting in the car, anywhere where you can have a few minutes to yourself. It’s not hard to find these moments. 
  5. When you begin, take a few deep cleansing breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth. Then breathe nice easy breaths filling your lungs with good and blowing out the bad. Focus on breathing until you can feel relaxed. 
  6. Be in the moment. Let yourself go. It may take some time, but don’t stress. It comes with time and practice. It’s not hard to master it will happen. Don’t act like your unique “It won’t work for me.” Yes, it will work for you! 
  7. I will lose my edge. “I need my pain.” No, actually you don’t! You won’t lose 

Meditation is the best way to connect yourself with you! Learning to quiet one’s mind allowing ourselves to connect with the Universe. It’s a blessing beyond any measure. You can focus your thoughts on your minds-eye.  Opening up a whole new world of favor in your life.

self help, happy, smile

When you can see yourself in the positive light, you want for your life. Oh my, a peace you have never experienced will come over you in waves.

The beautiful thing with meditation is that when you do stumble and fall. Meditation is a tool that will help you re-center yourself. The quicker you get back to the good you the better.

You can meditate for so many things:

  • Good Health
  • A happy you!
  • The spiritual connection to God
  • Happy Relationship
  • Finding answers to life’s questions

How I involve my meditation practice into my life. First, I told myself this was more important to my growth than just about any other modality. My connection to God is how I like to see it. Seeing myself grateful for happiness, good health and all that God has to show me in my life.

During meditation, I am able to feel more connected to the Universe than just about any other time. One huge benefit for me; being able to have the patience to allow my life’s destiny to unfold. No longer forcing growth. If you don’t understand that statement, you will.

You can find time to meditate. Before work, after work, in the car (not driving of course), kids nap time, when you wake up, when you go to bed, sitting at the park, sitting by a river, just find a moment and do it.

Optimal time is 20 to 30 minutes for me. You can also get in a good quick relaxing breathing exercise for sixty seconds. The more you think about time is lost time you could have been meditating. This is your meditation practice, so time is not relevant to your success. You can go an hour or sixty seconds. Don’t worry about the time you’ll know when you’re done.

Consistency in your practice will dictate the level of success you have. Find time every day even when you have to steal the time.

Get started today! Don’t think, do!

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Keep Moving your Life Even when it seems You Cannot

“I hated every minute of training, but I said, ‘Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.”–Muhammad Ali

 

self help, God, Prayer
Fight Through Even When you think you Cannot

 

 

Many days are like training. I hate every minute, but I keep pushing through. Keeping God on my mind, but not really feeling him present. Life can kick you in the gut, we can choose to fall apart or just keep moving.

Keeping moving somedays takes every ounce of my strength. As I am sure to not be the only person on this earth that struggles through. Let us say that most of us are kindred souls when it comes to living life.

Do not stall when life just seems like “really” can’t catch a damn break! Scream if you have to but say “I am NOT LOSING this time.” Fight, fight and fight through, you can do it. I do it most days you can too.

help, hope, happy

Tell the enemy NOT today asshole, you don’t get the satisfaction of bringing me down. Do this even if you don’t see hope. Fly on blind faith but fly. The reason that I am writing this article is today I am operating on blind faith. Many things have fallen apart, but I know that it’s a temporary problem.

The problem is I don’t believe that statement this moment, but what the hell else can I do but to keep moving forward. I can stop saying F’it. What would that do but make things worse!

So if I can do this so shall you! We all get hit with life that hurts. Instead of giving up work through it even when your mind and body are fighting you.

God bless!

 

Setting Boundaries

When you examine how your life is working day-to-day. It’s important to think about what is adding stress to your life. Could it be fixed by merely setting boundaries?

The answer to that is yes!

self help, happy, relationship

It’s okay to set boundaries in relationships, with children little or grown. When we set expectations for what is acceptable in our lives and what is not, it’s incredible how much easier life becomes.

Work can also be a place where clear boundaries need to be set.

This change, however, most likely won’t come without some resistance. Here is a checklist to help with that conversation:

  • Set clear and easy to understand boundaries. If you need to write them out, do so. Just make sure that whoever is on the receiving end understands clearly.
  • Over a reason why you need this boundary. Explain the stress that it brings.
  • Don’t get upset if it takes a bit of time for the behavior to change.
  • Let the person know you’re not mad, it’s just bringing undue stress into your life.

With just a little conversation we can set the stage for acceptable behavior.

If you struggle setting boundaries for family, friends or coworkers. Take time to write out your thoughts on how this relationship could be a two-way street. Don’t just jump in without some real thought.

Sleep on your results reread them. If satisfied sit down with the person and have a friendly chat. Set expectations and lay them out.

You don’t have to live at someone’s Becken call 24/7/365. Figure what you need to not have stress, put it out there and then hold that person or person’s accountable. It’s not unreasonable by any standard.

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Toxic Relationship Stops NOW

“Your past does NOT define your future.” This will become very clear as the story moves forward. Are you ready for change? If so then welcome.

It doesn’t matter whether you male or female. Either side can be on the receiving end of a toxic relationship. The article is written to both genders.

When you dwell into the past then thoughts of “I’m not worthy” “I’m worthless” will stop you in your tracks. It’s time to get our thinking into a healthy mindset; it’s time to smile again.

stress, spouse, self help

We really do this when it comes to letting go of relationships. Looking in that rearview mirror for clues. Answers that may never happen. It’s difficult to let go of relationships when we don’t understand fully why they ended or must end because it’s toxic.

Sometimes we’re in toxic relationships that it’s necessary for us to move on for our own sanity. Sadly, in this type of relationship, we get ourselves beaten down to the point that toxic behavior is allowed and accepted from ourselves. For some, the connection itself means more than our own serenity.

Allowing ones’ self to fall prey to this type of relationship is far more comfortable than what you might think. We convince ourselves that this person will change, or something about ourselves we can change that will make our toxic partner love us.

First thing don’t believe you have no options. For example, a housewife with young children no family close and the list goes on. So, acceptance becomes easier than facing the pain. This life is not your portrayal of a doormat. “Woo-Hoo I landed the part of a lifetime Doormat!” Not only NO but heck NO!

What now seems like a no-way-out scenario. Is temporary if you make it so.

This story will help:

Let’s pretend for a moment that the relationship of our dreams is at the top of a vast mountain we must climb to the summit to live happily-ever-after. Stay with me I know it sounds cheesy.

Our emotions are so heavy for the beautiful relationship we have to carry them in a backpack. So we load love, passion, desire, tranquility, and fulfillment into our pack. This is a lot of heavy emotions we’re carrying up the hill. The good news, for now, is that it all fits and we can carry it. The summit does not seem so far away.

Now comes our partner who has a few things we need to carry for them. These toxic emotions are incredibly dense.

What could be so much?

  • Control
  • Jealousy
  • Anger
  • Narcissistic behavior
  • Abuse both physical and mental (If physical violence is a part of your life, reach out for professional help, contact your local law enforcement. Protection and assistance are a phone call away)

So as the relationship begins “your hike up the hill” the emotions mentioned above get stuffed in your backpack. Not all at once mind you but slowly as you ascend to the summit. With each step, the pack becomes more burdensome, and your ability to combat these new emotions diminishes due to mental fatigue.

Until finally you just fall from exhaustion from the toxic emotional weight of the pack.

This becomes a dark place where we just see no light. The trail becomes so obscure we’re not able to see any hope (light at the end of the path to guide us). If you’re in this place, breathe! We’re getting ready to turn on the light to guide your way. Hope exists.

So what happens now? The answer is the flashlight that is in the bottom of your backpack that is now stuffed so tightly you cannot reach inside to get it. You’re going to have to unload the pack enough to get to the light. The flashlight holds the key to lighting your way.

Here are some simple steps bringing light to start now:

  1. Take a moment and breathe, yes breathe. Find a place that you can take a couple of minutes to just breathe. Take a couple of deep cleansing breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth. Then just breathe for at least one minute. Relax your body. Relaxed clear mind! 
  2. Start walking every day. Do this for a couple of reasons. One you need strength, two you have an opportunity to clear your
  3. Learning to make your mind, relax your body. Power comes from within when you can harness that strength, see yourself while meditating towards that which you truly desire.
  4. Accept that YOU are allowed to be happy. Allowed to have the life you want. Your current situation is not a sentence.
  5. Educate yourself with suitable material. Apply what you learn to gain strength and enlightenment. Make an investment in your own happiness.

Would you like to know what the good news is? Five new negative emotions were added to your backpack. You now have five steps that have helped you remove enough garbage out of your pack so that now the flashlight that guides your way is within reach in your bag.

Grab it!

Now, let’s finish our climb.

With a lighter pack and light to see the trail. You can stand up and finish the journey. Toxic relationships are not anyone’s destiny. Getting out of it may have some pain that must be endured. Our steps outlined help you develop the strength to take the strain.

With your lighter pack and flashlight in hand begin your walk. The summit is now is starting to come clear from the fog that WAS your life. Practice every day these simple steps, and you will be amazed at how quickly your emotional strength will recover.

See yourself at the top of the mountain. Now we need to add a little to what happens when we get to the top of our mountain.

At the top of the mountain, the summit, the pinnacle of your happiness. From this vantage point, you see, happiness, love, joy, and freedom to live the life you dreamt of. With the strength to say what is acceptable and what is NOT acceptable in your life experience.

We all may enjoy a life filled with trials and tribulations, but those trials are not acceptable when induced by someone that professes to love us.

You now have the tools to begin the journey. Remember, you’re not alone, and you are worthy of happiness.

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Helpful Resources:

Pastoral Counseling (reach out to a local Church that offers Pastoral Care)
Marriage Counseling (many centers work on a sliding scale for payment)